Meglomania is Never Fun….

Alan J. Schwarz
6 min readNov 25, 2019

Max Feld wondered what he should do. He had taken Laurie Weltz on two dates and he didn’t know if he should go for a third.

The first date had been for drinks at the Blue Elephant and the atmosphere and the Jazz music had led to a very comfortable time. They had talked and laughed and she shared insights about her business. She was the creator of ‘’Tres Gorgeous’’ it was a makeup and hair brand she had created. She had just signed Raylin George a high profile Reality Star to endorse the brand and the product demand had jumped over a hundred percent.

When Max took her home after their first date, she had given him a passionate kiss goodbye and told him she would be waiting by the phone for his call to arrange the next date. Max of course took her actions and words as a very good sign and two days later he called to set up a dinner at L’Jardin, one of the best restaurants in Soho.

Max was dazzled when Laurie joined him at L’Jardin. She looked amazing. She smiled upon entering the restaurant (she had Ubered from her office to meet him) and gave him a warm kiss Hello. They ordered a nice bottle of Chardonnay and their food. She had Veal Piccata and he had Pasta Primavara. The conversation was mostly about Laurie’s day and how she had made a deal for distribution of her product in Europe. She talked about her Marketing plans and the Advertising Agency she had just engaged to create greater awareness of ‘’Tres Gorgeous.’’

Max tried to steer the conversation away from business to personal, but Laurie kept coming back to ‘’Tres Gorgeous’’, her team and how proud she was that they were all working together coherently and smoothly. Max understood, she was proud of her new product line and she wanted to share her enthusiasm. He did however notice, that she never asked a question about his day or life. She talked about a trip she was planning to Paris, and when he started sharing a story about his adventures when he visited the South of France she didn’t seem very pleased. ‘’I am talking about Paris, the Fashion Capital of Europe, one of the inspirations for ‘’Tres Gorgeous’’, not some wine drinking in the South. That’s not really inspirational when we’re talking about my brand.’’

It was a definite, I don’t want to hear about your story, listen to mine kind of moment. When desert came Laurie declined, saying she had recently done a photo shoot for an entrepreneurial magazine and she thought she could have looked slimmer. She looked at Max like he was a dummy and explained that as the Chief Executive Officer of her brand, she was in the public eye and had to always look ready for paparazzi. Since she and Raylin George were now working closer together, there always seemed to be photographers wanting to shoot her, it was all about glamour. She was sure she would be in the digital gossip pages of TMZ within the week. She then went on to talk about her hiring WAFWOT (What A Fabulous Way Of Thinking) Communications to do her personal Media/Public Relations. They were known as the hottest firm in New York.

After the bill was delivered, Max asked Laurie if she was interested in coming back to his place to chill. They could drink some wine, turn on the fireplace listen to some R&B and relax. She shook her head and politely declined. She said she had a full schedule the rest of the week and she just wanted to get home. She explained that she liked to scan the internet before she went to bed to see if there were any articles that had been written about her.

Max drove her home and the entire time Laurie was texting on her phone. When they reached her Condo building she smiled and looked at him. ‘’Thanks for a great night, I thought L’Jardin could have been better but it was a good attempt to try and impress me and you almost did it. I have been texting with Troy L’Croix. He has a new movie coming out and he wants me to be his date for the premier. It will raise my profile when people see me with him on the red carpet. I’m sure it will make you jealous but when you are a celebrity, that’s the sacrifices you have to make in your personal life.’’

Max didn’t know how to answer, he thought L’Jardin was amazing and he wasn’t trying to impress her, he was trying to enjoy a great restaurant and a fun night out. As far as Laurie being with Troy L’Croix, he had gone on two dates with her which didn’t constitute a relationship. He couldn’t be jealous, because he wasn’t that involved with her. He did however know stats and facts about her business.

Max got out of the car and opened Laurie’s door. She took a quick look around to make sure no one was watching and gave him a passionate kiss, tongue included. ‘’If we go out again, I’m sure you’ll put more effort in finding somewhere wonderful to take me. Oh and look for me with Troy on the red carpet. I’m sure you’ll think I look really hot.’’

A week passed and Max was conflicted. Laurie was pretty and when she wasn’t being completely self indulgent she was fun. His first date with her had been amazing, the second date had been disappointing, what would a third date hold?

Max took a break from work and left the office to go for a walk in Central Park. It was always a great place to think and since the sun was shining and people were picnicking it guaranteed a great mood. Max called Laurie’s number and she answered on the third ring. ‘’Hi Laurie, I’ve been thinking about you, and would love to go out again, are you available on Thursday Night, I have Yankee tickets. They’re in my company’s box. It should be a lot of fun.’’ Laurie hesitated. ‘’Listen Max, you’re a nice guy, but I don’t see how you can help me or ‘’Tres Gorgeous’’ get to where we need to go. I find you passable in terms of looks, but your personality is not very strong. I need someone who inspires and motivates me. A box in Yankee Stadium is cool but it is kind of yesterday. I’ll tell you what I’ll do, I’ll keep your number in my phone and if someday I decide to give you another try I’ll call, but I think we are too different. I’m a high flyer, a celeb, a person that is in demand, and you are just an average guy. I need more. So, sorry for hurting your feelings, but after thinking about us, I don’t want to waste my time. By the way, you will be able to see me on the Entertainment shows tonight, like Entertainment Tonight, and TMZ cause I’ll be walking the Red Carpet with Troy L’Croix. You can tell people you know me, but I’d appreciate if you didn’t tell them you dated me, it would make me look bad.’’

Max was dumbfounded. It was the ultimate diss. He didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye, because Laurie abruptly ended the conversation. He had never been on the receiving end of a call like that.

At twenty six, Max had dated a fair number of women, but no one was like Laurie Weltz. She should have been called Laurie Welts, because he felt like he had just received a whipping. Her attack on his character was vicious. All he had done was taken her on two dates and had asked if she wanted to go out on a third. The ways she rejected a third date had been nasty and unwarranted.

That night Max watched the Entertainment News and there was interviews with Troy L’Croix about his new movie, but not one interview with Laurie which must have made her nuts. It was kind of funny to see her standing in the background with nobody showing any interest in her at all.

When Max went to sleep that night, he thought about the whole Laurie situation and genuinely laughed. She had never once asked him what he did for a living, or really tried to get to know him. If she had, she would have found out that he was a partner in a Hedge Fund and Leveraged Buyout Company that owned the largest Makeup and Hair brand in the world. A company that would never have an interest in investing or getting involved with ‘’Tres Gorgeous’’. As Max’s head hit the pillow he smiled thinking about the delicious irony.

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Alan J. Schwarz

Alan Schwarz loves life. He is the founder of JAMS Productions, a television production company based in Toronto . His passion is writing.