Don’t you dare write about me!

Alan J. Schwarz
7 min readMay 5, 2021

Newspapers were not as popular as they used to be and Wyatt Collins knew it. He published the only paper in Gelca, Ontario and he was running out of money.

Wyatt knew he needed a big story, something that would capture national attention and prove there was a place for community media. The biggest problem Wyatt had was Herschell Ostrepeller. He was the only Journalist on his staff and he used that word loosely.

Herschell had graduated from Del Pino College with a two-year diploma in Journalism and Wyatt was amazed. He couldn’t figure out how the shmendrick had graduated out of his mother’s womb. Herschell was not the fastest runner in the race. The good news was he did everything Wyatt told him to do for very little pay. Herschell would say ‘’My Dad always says there’s nothing more valuable than experience, so I want every kind of experience.’’ Wyatt was happy to oblige, Herschell had cleaned windows, swept floors, picked up lunch from Loo Loo’s Cafe, and wrote stories about the local sports teams. The Gela High School Pioneers.

Wyatt knew controversy was good, and he came up with an idea. Herschell would make a great sacrificial lamb so he really didn’t have anything to lose. He would throw him under the bus once the story was done.

The biggest business in Gelca was the H.R. Spaulding Component plant. Spaulding made switchers and other key parts for telecommunication companies that specialized in optic fibre to deliver broadband signals.

Wyatt waited till Herschell was finished painting the bathroom. ‘’Herschell, good job on painting the basement and the bathroom, I have an assignment for you for the newspaper. I have heard there’s something suspicious going on at the factory and I want you to find out what it is and write an expose. Here’s the thing, if you don’t find anything I still want something dramatic. You have one week. Do you understand?’’

Herschell was filled with unmitigated happiness. He had a couple of good friends who worked at the factory and he was sure they could get him in. He really liked Bonnie Leadon, and he’d been friends with Todd Ference forever. It would be great to spend time with them. The only strange part was they had never mentioned any funny business at H.R. Spaulding.

Alan J. Schwarz

Alan Schwarz loves life. He is the founder of JAMS Productions, a television production company based in Toronto . His passion is writing.